You can know that you’re really committed to following through with your plans if you make a plan that works for you personally.
Self-sabotage happens when you create a plan that you know you can’t follow through with.
For example, say that you want to start a meditation practice and eventually you want to work up to 30 minutes a day of meditation because you know that it would benefit you.
Mentally; you’d have more clarity, physically; it would benefit your health, spiritually and emotionally; it would help you feel more centered.
There are all these benefits that you know it would help you with – but if you start off by saying, “I’m going to meditate 30 minutes a day,” and then a week later you’re like, “Well it’s Sunday, I’m going to sleep in instead of doing my meditation; I feel good so I’m going to take this morning off.”
That is self-sabotaging, but if you start with something that you definitely know you can do, like say, “Well I definitely know I can start with 5 minutes a day and I can stick to that no matter what.”
So you stick with that and eventually it feels natural to you.
There are all these Psychology studies that say it takes 21 – 30 days to break a habit. So, if you say “I can definitely start with 5 minutes and no matter what, no excuses, I’m going to commit to the 5 minutes a day.”
You can remind yourself of the benefits – “It’s going to make me feel so good, and it is already making me feel so good, and I feel so calm and centered and stable and clear…” and just keep giving yourself that motivation, and then when you get to the end of the 30 days it feels so natural for you that you can increase it to 10 minutes.
You just keep going until it becomes natural to you because of course, at first, lifestyle changes don’t feel natural.
You’re like, “Why am I doing this?? It doesn’t make sense…” and then you remind yourself of the benefits, and you continue with it until you’re like, “Wow, I did all these things and I really did make this change, because I care about myself and I’m committed to doing what makes me feel good.”
Another level to this is if there’s an event or project you’re working on like a book, or an art project. When you do that there’s an energy that you bring through and you change things in this reality.
When you participate in life and change reality, life responds. You want to leave room or the unexpected to happen, because things may not go how you expect.
You want to be a part of that flow of life where you’re bringing through your creative expression and sharing your love with the world and creating events and planning ahead for certain things to happen.
But you also have to give room for the unexpected to happen and just to see how life responds to that and how you respond to it – to the changes that you’re bringing through.
Even though you do need to give yourself that time and space, and be patient with yourself and gentle with yourself, you still need to make the plan and follow through with what you say you’re going to do.
Make your plans and play your part, because if you don’t do anything then nothing will change. Getting out there and creating and working on creative projects may not turn out how you expect, but if you don’t do anything then nothing will change.